“An ordinary teacher cannot be transformed into a Montessori teacher, but must be created anew, having rid herself of pedagogical prejudices. The first step is self-preparation of the imagination, for the Montessori teacher has to visualise a child who is not yet there, materially speaking, and must have faith in the child who will reveal himself through work. The different types of deviated children do not shake the faith of this teacher, who sees a different type of child in the spiritual field, and looks confidently for this self to show when attracted by work that interests. She waits for the children to show signs of concentration.”
Maria Montessori | Education for a New World
If you're a Montessori guide, you're familiar with this call to imagine the child who is not yet there. That's the basis of our work. But lately, in my teacher-mom journey, I have learned that I also have to be looking for the guide in myself who is not yet there. Our work of spiritual preparation does not end when we finish Montessori teacher training, and a guide who continually looks for the child who is not there must continue to look for our own growth and always envision a guide who is not yet there. And I'm learning that growth comes when we push ourselves toward the edges of our comfort zone.
Today, I want to share more about my own teacher-mom journey of getting out of my comfort zone and opening a school! The past nine months have been a wild ride. In May, I began exploring Wildflower Schools, and in June, my partner Stephanie and I took the leap and got to work. Since then, it's been a slow roll that's led us to where we are today, neck deep in school planning with hopes of opening our program in the fall. Our mission is to offer authentic, affordable Montessori education for three to six-year-olds in Nashville through a tiered tuition model.
The past nine months have been some of my most challenging months balancing my work as a teacher and parent, as I've added the role of school founder. Often, I wear all these hats at once while I continue to work in my classroom and navigate newfound school leadership and the never-ending work of parenting. Most of my weeknight evenings are filled with meetings. My kids have learned to ask if I'm on Zoom before knocking on my bedroom door. Some nights, I don't connect with my kids until after 9, when they all end up at the foot of my bed, filling me in on their day. Weekends have become a place to catch up on my work as a teacher-trainer, and lately, they have been filled with grant writing and email exchanges with the fire marshal.
In the last nine months, I've learned a lot about balance. I'm learning what my capacity is, and I'm learning to say no. I'm also learning to find little moments of rest, whether reading a few pages in my library book before bed or sitting down for dinner with my family. The hope of a whole weekend of rest is just a dream this season, so these small moments of rest have been essential for my continued well-being.
My experience with Wildflower has been equal parts empowering and exhausting. Wildflower Schools operate with a teacher-leader model, meaning that the teachers are also the school leaders. One of the most frustrating parts of being a teacher is not having a voice in the decisions that affect my students. The primary role of a Montessori guide is to remove obstacles to development. Even the most well-meaning administrators create obstacles when making decisions while far removed from the daily work of the classroom. Wildflower empowers teacher leaders as decision-makers and offers guidance and support. I've been given the tools to learn how to form a board of directors, create a sustainable budget, and write a grant.
I have learned so much in the past nine months and have been out of my comfort zone more than ever in my career. I leave many meetings feeling wholly inadequate. Its made me think of the children in my classroom that are stretching and growing each day. Growth can be awkward and at times, painful. All of this work outside of my comfort zone has given me a new appreciation for the young children who show up in my classroom each day, ready to take on their developmental tasks.
So, if you are a Montessori guide, I hope this inspires you toward your own growth. Your growth might not look like opening a school. It might look like examining your teaching practices and asking for feedback from another teacher. It might look like enrolling in a professional development course. It might look like creating more space in our life for rest. It might look like applying for a new position or taking steps to expand your current one. Whatever it is for you, I hope you give yourself a gentle nudge toward the edge of your comfort zone, where the growth happens. Be gentle with your current self while always imagining the Montessori guide who is not yet there.